


The Duel

by MissIzzy



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Filk, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-01-01
Updated: 2004-01-01
Packaged: 2017-12-20 09:02:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/885453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissIzzy/pseuds/MissIzzy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written entirely for the last line.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Duel

**Author's Note:**

> Everyone was writing Britney Spears filks back in the first half of the noughties....I wrote one, removed it from my website, and my muse promptly obliged me to write this one.

####  **To the tune of "Crazy" by Britney Spears**

Scene:Harry and Voldemort face off at the end of Goblet of Fire.

Voldemort:   
 _Potter, do you like to duel?_  
 _I'm going to kill you, what can you do?_  
 _Potter, can you dodge my spells?_  
 _Oh my, you don't know how to cast them as well!_

_Every time I look at you_   
_I want to kill you, oh how it's true_   
_Killing you means so much more_   
_I've got your blood now, so I feel secure_

_You drive me crazy! You just won't die!  
Last time I faced you, I had to fly!_

Lucius:   
 _Oooh crazy! How he lets him fight!  
Something tells me that we will be here all night!_

Voldemort throws some Unforgiveables. Harry throws Imperius off.

Harry:   
 _Voldemort, just try to kill me,_  
 _I guess that you'll be the last thing I'll see._  
 _But I'll do what I can do,_  
 _Don't care if my spells are wasted on you!_

_Every time you look at me,  
I get all fearful, it's easy to see,_

_You drive me crazy! You just won't die!  
I tried to kill you, and you just fly!_

Lucius, Crabbe, and Goyle:   
 _Crazy! It's too long a fight!  
Yes we definitely will be here all night!_

Voldemort and Harry trigger Priori Incantatem. Cedric pops out of Voldemort's wand.

Cedric:   
Stop!

Frank Bryce, Bertha Jorkins, and Lily and James also pop out. They all advance on Voldemort.

Cedric, Frank, Bertha, Lily, and James:   
 _You drive us crazy Voldemort!_  
 _You killed us, and you just fly!_  
 _Oh but it's now all right,_  
 _Thanks to us Harry Potter will live tonight!_  
 _Crazy!_

Harry breaks the connection, grabs Cedric's body, Summons the Cup, and is out of there.

Voldemort:   
 _Crazy! Oh I lost this fight!_

Death Eaters:   
 _Well, at least we won't have to stand here all night!_


End file.
